Don't Cover Up for Your Mentally Ill Family Member
The Stigma of Mental Illness
The stigma associated with mental illness can lead us to cover up for a mentally ill loved one. That's a common but unwise thing to do. A stigma is a negative mark of shame, disgrace, or guilt associated with a particular circumstance, quality, or person. In our society there is no stigma asssociated with a physical illness. We cleanly differentiate between the person and their disease. And it is socially acceptable to openly talk about their medical condition in a gracious and compassionate manner. But in our society there is a stigma associated with mental illness that views it as a weakness or moral failure. Consequently, families are reluctant to speak the truth about their mentally ill family members because they don't want to deal with ignorant judging or idle gossip.
Mental health stigma refers to the negative attitudes, beliefs, and stereotypes that society holds about individuals with mental health conditions. It is a form of social discrimination and prejudice that has negative consequences for those affected by mental health issues. And it also makes it more difficult for families to speak the truth about their mentally ill family member(s). The following list is a summary of an article by NAMI (National Alliance for Mental Illness) about the stigma that our society associates with mental illness.
- Public Miconception: Viewing mental illness as as a personal weakness or character flaw rather than a legitimate medical condition.
- Stereotyping: People with a mental illness may be unfairly labeled or stereotyped.
- Social Isolation: People may avoid or exclude individuals with a mental illness.
- Discrimination: In employment, education, housing, relationships. etc.
- Reduced Self-Esteem: Because of stigma, people with a mental illness may view themselves as second-rate people.
- Barriers to Treatment: Stigma discourages mentally ill people from seeking professional help and treatment.
Mental Illness and Spiritual Warfare -
If you have a mentally ill family member, you will be continually "blind-sided" until you understand the interplay between mental illness and spiritual warfare. If you don't believe the following two Bible verses, then skip this website page. But if you do believe them, please continue reading.
Eph 6:12 (NIV) - "For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms."
John 3:20-21 NIV - "Everyone who does evil hates the Light, and does not come into the Light for fear that his deeds will be exposed. But whoever practices the truth comes into the Light, so that it may be seen clearly that what he has done has been accomplished in God.”
Ephesians 6 tells us that we are in a continual spiritual war against evil. And please get this straight: the enemy of our souls never fights fair. He takes advantage of every weakness he can find - including stress, fatigue, lack of sleep, addiction, and mental illness. Mentally ill people are particulary vulnerable to demonic influence. They are already mentally imbalanced and therefore easy targets for demonic manipulation. If you have ever been the victim of a bipolar rage, you know that it's not the raging person who is in control. It's someone else with an evil agenda. And since evil flourishes in the dark, it uses the stigma of mental illness to enforce silence and cover up its activity.
Summary - Don't cover up for your mentally ill loved one! In a healthy relationship we naturally cover for one another's little mistakes. It's the loving thing to do, part of the normal give-and-take of relationships, and the grease that keeps the wheels from squeeling. But you're not in Kansas anymore Dorothy! You've got a mentally ill family member! You're going to have to learn some new skills and "unlearn" some old ones. And covering up for them is one of the old skills that you will have to "unlearn."